Perhaps once the healing process has gone to the point that it needs to go to, perhaps then I will be able to call myself a survivor.

My experience took place over the course of maybe two, three years. But then fast forward, lots of things that have occurred in my life, lots of deaths, family members, close people, suicide, a tragedy within our family. It's all connected.

It's hard to be supported when you don't speak on things. As my intersection as a black female, an artist, an empath, youngest child, and all those things, you're kind of told to shut down. Well, we'll just keep that quiet, right?

The biggest thing that's helped me is a loving relationship with my best friend that I've been married to for 24 years.

I speak as someone who is loved, and I speak as someone who has a giving heart, and I speak as someone who is an empath and needs to recognize my own boundaries. I speak as a mother who wants to protect her children from everything. I speak as a wife and a friend who feels that they've hurt the person closest to them.

I speak as someone that is afraid of disappointment. I speak as someone who is afraid of vulnerability and showing their true self. I speak as someone who has experienced so much loss, but also doesn't know how to talk about it. Or come out of the grief.

I speak as someone who has a lot to offer and really wants to help a lot of people. But sometimes struggles finding her own voice. But can easily offer advice and comfort to everyone except herself.